Thursday, September 8, 2011

A Letter On Your Birthday

Dear Miss Paula,

It is hard to believe that you left us almost five months ago.  It seems like it’s been an eternity.  Not a day goes by that I don’t think of you several times a day or wish that that horrible disease didn’t take you away from us way to soon.  I hope you are looking down on us and watching us continuing to live our lives like you wanted. 

Cecilia has developed quite the little personality!  She is my girly girl and Daniel’s tom boy all wrapped into one.  She can count to twenty now (although when she gets to five she says nine, it’s one, two three, four, NINE, six seven, eight, NINE, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen…she just likes saying nine twice!), she also knows her ABCs and loves to sing the Alphabet Song.  Her all time favorite song is still “Itsy Bitsy Spider” I try to sing it and do all the motions like you did, but I know I will never be able to do as good as you.

Every night before Cecilia goes to bed we say her prayers.  We always pray that you are watching over us and that you are safe in heaven without any pain or sickness. She doesn’t understand death, but I am sure the older she gets the more questions she will ask about you and what happened.  I don’t know how you explain to someone so young, but thankfully we have tons of pictures and videos of the two of you together to show her for years to come!

Your death was hard on everyone, but especially Daniel.  He still has tons of questions, about why you were the one taken.  He still isn’t able to watch a TV show or movie where cancer is mentioned.  He is getting stronger though.  I have a feeling the holidays will be especially hard on him, for twenty six years you were by his side every Thanksgiving and Christmas and not having you there this year will be difficult.  I promise to be there for him, but I know no one will ever be a replacement for you.

I always told everyone I got lucky when it came to a mother in law, I couldn’t have asked for a better one and to this day I still mean it.  You weren’t just a mother in law for me, but you were a confidant and a friend. I hope today you are celebrating your birthday in style up there, maybe your mom made you one of your favorite meals like chicken and dumplings and I am sure for dessert there will be some type of chocolate cake!

Happy fifty second birthday!

I love you!


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